Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in bigbeff's LiveJournal:

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Friday, January 28th, 2005
8:48 am	randomness.... ok so from now on i have to be more conscience of how ppl are and if they'll think what i do is funny er something, because i have to do my best to respect others. But yet I know im not perfect and if im not sure how one will react to something i do best guess not to do it until i would know for sure how they would react because i dont want to go over on my maxium number of hit lists. my goal in life is to be on at least five hitlists er something along those lines.lol.just like i want to be a bag lady ;) haha.but doing something for example recently i put stuff in "bobs'" waterbottle and now we just kinda agrue but in a way its fun haha..not to be mean. and not to make excuses but i just think agrueing with him was almost inevitable because idk he just his moments :P but all i all it doesnt matter i have to try to treat everyone the same. As it says in the bible when the pharisees asked jesus what was the greatest commandment he said there were two:"love the lord your God with all your heart,soul,and mind."and"love your neighbor as you love yourself" Obviously im not perfect.only God/Jesus/the Holy Spirit are and naturally i'll make mistakes. I mean its taken awhile to even think a nice thought about "sally" because ive never truly liked her as a person for the past oh i'd say 13-14 yrs.yah..somewhere in that ballpark.but yah.i try to just treat ppl exactly how i treat my friends back home because idk i just tend to do that because i want them to get a good impression of me.i dont want ppl thinking im mean er something.but in a way its like i dont care what you think of me if its going to be negative..but only to a certain extent i would say.because then again i have to treat ppl as i would wanted to be treated.blah.its such a blah blah blah blah kinda of situation but everyones going to have those ppl in their life that their not going to get along with but you just have to do your best not to totally be like number one on their "hit list" but if you want to be number one then go right ahead.more power to ya!although idk when i think of someone with a "hit list" i would think of a 35 yr old that lived with his mom until he was like 25 because he was too lazy to get his own place,but sadly his mommy died but he still lives @ home,because the house is paid for.but he had to get a job and everyone at work thinks he's a spazz-sadly-and that he's creepy so not to many people talk to him and if he tries to talk to anyone they tend to walk away.for the christmas party he actually went and tried to socialize and his co-workers did make an effort to talk to him but he had a funky smell to him..so the party kinda ended sooner.but yah...than everyone in high school who made fun of him he has on his "list" so he's waiting patiently for the 10 yr class reunion to get back @ them.but not quite like in a "kari you hurt me we're all going down!"kinda of way.but yah.i suppose i should wrap this up....who knows how much longer i have...before they're done picking bills and come up and complain....yah i had an upset tummy this morning so im just sitting here in a chair trying to get better so far so good..but i'll prolly go later to make an effort to find the Doctor of the Day to see if they've got tums er something because i hate pepto bismol*idk sp*because its nasty and it'll make me throwup and i dont like throwing up like i'd start crying lol because im so scared of it.sad but true,especially when i was little i would do that.but enough about me...how you doing?lol REMEMBER TO BUCKLE UP.WATCH OUT FOR OLD LADIES WITH WALKERS.BRUSH&FLOSS YOUR TEETH.WASH BEHIND YOUR EARS.AND....IF WEARING TIGHTS AND YOU HAVE A RUN...EITHER A)HAVE ANOTHER PAIR WITH YOU B)IGNORE IT BECAUSE PPL REALLY SHOULDNT BE LOOKING @ UR LEGS NEWAYS...C)NAIL POLISH? D)GO TO WAL-MART ER SOMETHING OR E)JUST GIVE PPL DIRTY LOOKS IF THEY SAY SOMETHING LOL ;) :D (Comment on this)
Thursday, January 27th, 2005
9:53 am	hey tony... so right now im paging in the s.dakota capital its awesome this experience is "rocking my socks off and back on again" i tell ya! its not as boring as the average joe off the street who lived with his parents until he was 25 because he was scared of commitment b/c he's had a gf for like 4 yrs and he was afraid to get married but then again he had to ask for permission from his parents...and they always turned him down they said he wasnt ready yet...finally they said maybe....they're kinda of changing to yes but they're still not to sure....this girl has a cat named Franchesco*idk sp* and they're not quite sure if that's an appropiate name for a cat..it makes them think that this girl is too crazy for their lil' Don Juan.but that's a whole different story.lol...but neways as i've said before and of course i'll say it again and again but as a teenage girl i appreciate all these teenage boys who ARENT ugly walking around here...some are on school tours, some are interens lol and what not.but yah its a rocking experience.blah blah blah.the pages that im paging with are totally rockin too! they're awesome.especially the girls..they're so much fun for example last night when we went to the mall...there a couple of my pages that talked to this purty good looker of a guy and then we saw him and his friend today.so yah its awesome.great times.but of course im getting a great educational experience from all of this i tell ya what.learning how to pick and pull bills and how to do stuff for the representatives..but yah....idk what to all say i could blab on and on...but i'll ttyl.take care.buckle up.wash ur hair.wash BEHIND ur ears.brush and floss your teeth.watch out for "sketchy"guys at hotels,especially,if they reach into their coat pocket! (Comment on this)
Friday, January 21st, 2005
2:28 pm	one time i was asked....hey do you want my cheese aight. so this last weekend the 14th-16th i went on a ski trip. Yah after like 4-5 hours of sleep i went skiing all day.yes! of course after awhile i got cold and wanted to warm up. So during my time in the ski lodge this odd random boy asked me if i wanted his cheese(nacho cheese) i said no.he continued to quite persistent and really insisted that i take his cheese.i said i didnt like cheese.this boy had good intentions becaus he did not want to waste these cheese. Well i told him to go to the counter and he could have waited for someone to buy nachos and therefore he could give them his cheese.i won and he lost he ended up throwing it away,but then i was like "but i dont take things from strangers" he commented"oh but you've known me since you were two"random? yes i'd say. but i like random.it was insane but funny.but be careful if one is to ask you if you want their cheese because they may not be as so random and with non-harmful intentions as other people in this world. and that is my insight on people asking you if you want their cheese. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 29th, 2004
4:21 pm	so ima goob... blah. I don't even know the last time i wrote an entry for this, but doesn't matter a lot of "stuff" i guess has happened. In not really exciting news I've learned after how many years...to swallow a pill.its sad that it's taken me this long, but i always knew my time would come and guess who was right! although i thought it'd be when i was like 30 yrs old.but hey...everyone moves @ their own pace.some slower than others but that's aight.but hey this is going to be short..b/c my "kidnapper" is going to come get me soon..otherwise i'd blab on and on.but yah i'll ttyl.bubye. (Comment on this)
Saturday, December 4th, 2004
5:44 pm	a taste of hunger... so this weekend i did this 30 hr. famine which just means you fast -dont eat-for thirdy hrs. i would love to stay i didnt eat anything the whole time but i would be lying because i went to mickey d's and got free cookies and a glass of water. but this experience has taught me once again to appreciate things i have.the things i can do. i mean although i may have gotten really hungry during this at least i knew at the end of it i would be able to eat unlike those who really suffer everyday and die because they dont have anything to eat. it saddens me really to know there's so much food wasted here in the US and there's so many out there suffering everyday. i really despise wasting food and yet i work @ mcdonalds.where they waste so much food. to me a dream day of work would be running out of food..completely because then that way i know at the end of the day they wouldnt waste any food. yet it frustrates me because some of the mananagers wont let you take the food home at the end of the night because its againist the end of the rules.well i mean there we are willing ppl to eat this food because all they're going to do it just throw it away and so many ppl would do anything to eat it. its frustrating! blah. and this last summer like i've mentioned to a lot ppl seeing homeless ppl up close and personal and actually having conversations with them...really got to me. ever since that trip i've never stopped thinking about them.praying about them.wondering if they're doing ok.wondering if they have a warm nice place to stay.but only god knows.but i hope everyday that they're ok.that was a factor in me making the decision to go into ministry.to help reachout to ppl like that.to help get others to reach out to others like that because its honest to goodness a life changing experience.i dont think anyone could have gone on that trip and not have felt something whether it really stuck with them or not idk.but seriously they couldnt have left without taking something back that god touched them with after that trip.blah.i could go and on and on because well i can just blah on and on about things especially this because i can get pretty talkative about this..idk..i just care for these ppl and other ppl like that ya know that have to suffer..but i know that if we pray for them God can help them in ways that we may not be able to.because well he is god and rocks my socks off and back on again and plus nothing is to impossible for him. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 1st, 2004
1:56 pm	hi my name is... hi my name is bigbeff and i have a problem.this is something that people who seek help such as going to aa meetings and what not say when they stand up..yatta yatta yatta. ok.so far so good. i've admitted i have a problem.but what pacifically is the problem? oofta.too many to just choose one.sad but isnt it how it is for all of us? dont lie *thou shall not testify falsely againist thy neighbor* see its a sin to lie.and the BIG MAN upstairs is watching you.blah.neways.moving on.it has come to my attention that i have a problem hitting males.lol.although in the past 5-6 yrs ive only done this to three different people.it still seems to be three too many. two were with my foot and one was with a broom.*eyebrow raise* a broom? maybe ur thinking ok this girl is obviously twisted and i dont care to know her problem here.well im just trying to get help to get over my problem so get over urs to help me.blah.i mean none of them were too intentional but still it happened.what can i say.my problem that's what i can say.lol. but wait..just in general boys are my problem.i get to la-di-freakin'-da over them and it causes drama.un-needed (cuz i sp. the other obvious word) drama. but some (Guys) may say oh well its ur own fault for being a drama queen and that's another thing. it was brought to my attention by some friends..im a DRAMA QUEEN to them! can you believe them i mean come on people! whatever.. but wait my youth pastor said i was one too but he said it when we were ROCK PICKING hello ROCK PICKING isnt fun..and i know i shouldnt complain and that was like last year or w/e but still i've matured but w/e its ROCK PICKING no fun all you do is get all sweaty and dirty and gross and blah.but it did help me totally appreciate farmers a lot more. i mean now and then. what they must have had to go thru.oofta.glad it was them and not me because it would have had to been up to me we (my family unit or what not junk) woulda died. no chance to survive whats so ever because i'd be like ahhh this is to hard im lazy and idc.but the again they did have a BIG families back then so that all the kids could help about the farm.ok so maybe i'd do a lil' help around the farm just long enough so that when the kids got big enough they could take over.lol. but wait child labor laws now. good thing im not a farmer. but oh well im in school and class is about to get over so what i was trying to aim for idk.but it doesnt really matter now because i have to wrap this up.so bubye.hope you enjoyed reading this you.whoever you maybe. but believe me im a good girl-100% no sex b4 marriage kinda of gal.lol.incase you got bad thoughts about the broom. (Comment on this)
Sunday, November 14th, 2004
4:49 pm	god moment... so this has been a long time ago but i still think about how awesome it was!lol. and i mean god moments happen all the time..its a matter of whether or not ur eyes are open enough to see them! if you're willing to be open-minded about things maybe you would be able to see god works in ur life-everyday! blah. but dont take my word for -take the time to notice it but dont like spaz out on me and try to focus all ur attention on it b/c then you'll try to hard..miss it and be like haha he didnt work in my life.blah.yah b/c once again you would miss it.but w/e onto my story..here... picture it.june 23rd.2004.kansas city,mo/ks.(and before anything..really..when i was getting stuff ready for this day for some odd reason i was like hmmm-i think i'll put my lotion in my bag just incase someone needs it) this lovely morning my group was painting :P...and for some odd reason i thought to myself'hey we'll be responisible enough and i wont get that much paint on me!"so i didnt bring extra clothes :P when we got there idk they must have thought the girls would be more responsible with the paint-they gave us OIL BASED PAINT! oofta..we once again have proven someone wrong lol..because i got so much paint on me.blah. my friend and i painted each other lol.and the other girl too. my friend got paint all over my shorts..on my arms..on my legs..blah.totally messy. but i got the paint off my legs,arms and possibly face (i dont remember) with some paint remover.well little did we know that paint remover dries out ur skin. bam! i had my LOTION! boo-ya! total thanx went to god that day! and because after lunch..only after every saw i couldnt sit down @ lunch.blah. but yah. the other girl and i got to go back and change..well i changed and she did too but she shoulda showered then because well..she might have gotten paint in her hair...*eyes roll* hehe..but not totally all by me.i got her legs though.hey if you were painting that day in that room with us-you'd know pretty much no one got out w/out having some paint on them.hehe.but yah..great times! that kc trip oofta god moments ALL THE TIME!it was awesome..like my one camp friend says,"IT ROCKED MY SOCKS OFF AND BACK ON AGAIN!!!" and i got some great friends out of it too and served god and it was just a totally awesome experience. but yah so far this i would say was one of my more fun God moments*thumbs up* (Comment on this)
Friday, November 12th, 2004
3:13 pm	old crushes... yes...once again boys is the subject.lol.what can i tell ya im boy crazy but by now you've prolly figured that out. my friends like to tease me and say that i think ever boy i see is cute.in return i'll say oh its more like every other boy.lol. but of coarse the number one man in my life is GOD.he's my main squeeze. then my daddy.then my grandpa.then other boys. yeah...neways.i just talked to this guy who i met on a mission trip and kinda ended up having a crush on him but it was insane. like i couldnt hear like half of what he was saying lol and i was like wow ..fun..kewl. i prolly sounded retarded idk. but yeah. i called to see if his sister (one of my best friends)was home-she was not she went for a walk. but thanx to her i have never told her brother that i had a crush on him because she cared enough about me she saved me from making a fool out of myself.blah.i mean they live like 4 hrs away.blah.to far.oh well i still strive to visit them someday! and i will no matter what it takes.blah. neways..its (to me neways)insane when you think about ur old crushes -you're like what'd i ever see in them? sometimes you can see why ..well if they're good looking lol.but still..@ one point in time it was like you guys had some great times and that's why you fell for them.then you just grew apart and for example this boy its hard to like someone that lives like 4 hrs away.although think of those ppl who have someone special here and they're over in iraq.4 hours is practically nothing compared to that.blah. but still it was nice liking him.he was a nice boy. and the girls that knew him (Even his sister)could see us dating..she got a lil' ahead of herself and said it'd be awesome if we got married. but it was kewl b/c she said i was like the first girl she could see dating her bro-made me feel special.but idk it was in the past does it still count? that memories we had..idk.insane. but when i get married my old crushes wont matter.but when i have kids of my own my stories about them will come in handy.lol.but yah.like its weird when i look back @ the crazy things i've done because of guys i think oofta wait til' i can tell my kids these.blah.its weird but i (in a way) look foward to telling my kids about my life .about my growing up.my friends.my insane but awesome friends. crazy things i did-that some of the things they should never do.blah.oofta-call me a hopeless romantic but i cant wait til' my first love.my first honest love.they may not be the one i marry but still the first person i have an actually like lasting relationship..one that lasts more than 3weeks.but hey im in still in hs=sure some have had long relationship-but its me so im thinking i wont.possibly in college yes but that's in the future.i want to dwell on now and just enjoy things to the fullest.blah.but once again my entry must come to an end.blah.ttyl.have a great day <>< god bless <> (Comment on this)
Thursday, November 11th, 2004
10:19 pm	i had a good subject but i forgot what it was..oops so this one will be quite random and won't really have one subject since i forgot it...oh well. but since i cant remember it makes me feel OLD-senior moment! and im not talking senior as in a senior in hs or something im talking senior-citizen who likes to go to BINGO night @ the senior citizen center. Or likes to go to Hyvee during the week because they have like senior discount day and what-not. but someday in the future it will be me! scary..totally.blah. some may call me "boy-crazy" well actually its true but i mean its just something i am. but believe me i wouldnt do anything bad with a boy...ive flirted here and there or at least tried lol...but hey its also about being a girl..a teenage girl. although i had my first TWO crushes back in good ol' kindergarten lol. Usually though i'll like a guy and well he'll either know or wont..but usually he does b/c im an obivous person..it sux in a way though b/c well then there's no suprise lol. but i always try to be their friend first because being friends letcha ya get to know them and its kewl too b/c ya can never have too many friends.blah. speaking of friends i love my best friends so much. but in a total non-lesbian kinda way though.i love them in a wow-im-really-glad-ur-my-best-friend-kinda-way! lol. the two who live in the same town as me..oofta they totally rock! although all my best friends "rock my socks off and back on again" they're never boring-full of suprises!blah. they rock. im so happy god blessed me with them. life just wouldnt be the same w/out them..b/c w/out them it'd be boring! but oofta all my friends rock! especially my friends that i meet @ camps or rallies or mission trips :D I would even consider my Co-workers to be my friends i mean why not i spend enough time with them dont i? i sure do..because it feels like i dont have a life outside of work and school.blah. except when there's long weekends :D i sure do like those because then i get to sleep in! oh baby i love to sleep in! lol. i usually stay up late and then sleep in late..its awesome. although when i was little no matter how late i'd stay up i'd still be up b4 9am!blah.it was crazy. but the latest ive ever slept in was one something ,of coarse, it was in the afternoon. totally random thought-but dont ya just hate it when you cant tell if someone's looking @ you or not! but i mean wouldnt it make it obvious that they're looking @ you if they one)look away when you look @ them..two)they seem to keep doing it..three)when ur sitting down somewheres and they walk by and then stop and talk to the person that they're walking to? or does that just make you paranoid? maybe a lil' of both lol or maybe you're just a self-centered-cocky-little-bobblehead! idk.insane. but oofta this is a long one but that's ok its not the first really long one. and its not like a WHOLE LOT of people actually read my entries anyways oh well i still like to update my journal! <>< god bless <> (Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 10th, 2004
1:21 pm	teachers During the past 12 yrs almost 13 yrs of school not only me but every student has had some purty interesting teachers in their day. Whether they're good or bad most of them always leave an impression on you. they make a dent in your memory bank. my 4th grade teacher made an impression by always having a huge cup of coffee. and on her coffee cup was looney tune characters. and i mean it was so big by the time she'd get half way done it'd always be cold. lol. and her name..lol gozenbach oofta. in 3rd grade b/c i had two teachers...had a combined class..purty kewl. they were quite interesting though. in middle school oofta really interesting teachers. my gym teacher 7th grade year wore short shorts! scary! my 8th grade gym teacher was huge..not to be mean but oofta! and in hs i've some interesting teachers too i think its a requirement..to be a teacher you have to be weird lol idk....but i mean as an example of something my teacher used a snow shoveling shop with a XXX store in the back. Although he said he was “just kidding” I do wonder about him. Lol. And the way he’s always “yes..no..yes no..” I mean what’s up with that can’t he just say it once and be happy with that? Blah. Obviously not! Another thing my painting teacher..oofta what a weirdo! I mean it seems to be me whenever I have for a class (and I’ve had her like 3 times) she treats her class like their a bunch of little kids! Blah! When I had her for pottery she labeled everything like we couldn’t remember anything. An the movies we had to watch boring! But idk teachers have a job to teach us and as long as they do it w/e…even if students don’t like them and their boring and weird. But in the end they make great stories to tell others when you have nothing else to talk about lol. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, November 9th, 2004
9:13 am	blah.oh i'll brb.ok. ok so last night on msn i had two dudes tell me "oh i'll brb. ok? ok!" i was like sure w/e. but one dude that said that didnt come back for like 30 mins. but to me brb is approximentally 5-15 mins max. but maybe that's just me. and the other guy idk what he was doing but he was taking to long and i had to go b/c one it was getting late and two my show how clean is your house was on and then after that was the nanny.(my other show lol) yes i like lifetime-television for women. maybe b/c ima girl lol and i just like to watch those shows. the nanny and the golden girls..great shows lol. but enough about them back on track with brb. for daydreamers there's a land called lala land ..so would it be the same for "brb"ppl..or would it be a longer title such as "i-say-i'll-brb-but-really-i-wont-and-i-just-said-that-to-trick-you-in-a-little-weird-way-blah" but maybe my friends are right..im just a tad dramatic sometimes..but i mean they tell you oh i'll brb then 30 mins they come. and if you're not really talking to a whole lot of ppl or w/e b/c you can still notice that they're not back yet...you wonder..oh no did they fall in a hole and they cant get out and they're surrounded by wild animals that are just about to pounce on them ripping them from limb to limb! or they fell down a well and they're stuck down there for 7 days and after that they'll come after you if you watch this one video and then kill you after 7 days (you'll only understand if you saw the ring-great movie though-so if you havent seen it see it!) but neways w/e im not going to say i'll brb b/c i actually have to go so i'll be away but please leave a message after the beep *beep* (Comment on this)
Monday, November 8th, 2004
12:27 pm	silly girls.. why is it when you're younger you resort to plucking pedals from a flower, to see if a boy you like likes you back? as if the flower has this hidden powers within to tell you such a thing and if the flower doesnt tell ya what you want you just pick up another one and start over. Although depending on how many pedals it has you may purposily start so that when you end it it'll end up saying he likes you. so in the end flowers are dumb and pointless and they're objects wont help you anymore than a wigi board. but if you believe in that stuff...well that's no good that junk is demontic i mean the wigi board and such. On the other flowers are so much easier because a lot of girls are to shy to actually ask the guy if they like them so instead they use flowers. and the basic routin is.."he likes me..he likes me not" or w/e and so on and so on...and no matter how many flowers they may go thru it doesnt matter until they get the results they want. blah. some girls are just retarded lol. i do admire those girls though who do have the guts who just go up to them and are like "hey i like you and that's that" lol. who knows maybe somewhere there's a cult of girls who all own a wigi board and/or believe in like love potions and junk but w/e i would continue with this wonderful thought but i gotta go US GOV"T is calling me :P plus i have like 4 mins to get to class or w/e (Comment on this)
Sunday, November 7th, 2004
8:41 pm	oofta i havent written in awhile blah-sorry-i havent written in such a long long time....but this is a long one so if ya read it...it'll keep ya busy! ARE YOU FOR REAL..... well are you? I wanna know and SORRY im not going to leave ya alone til' ya tell me...anything and everything! Afraid to say something? are you scared of the consequences? too *flippin' burger bad!* sorry to be mean but "tough" love is needed of coarse not by you but me to get you to spill your guts! no more beating around the bush! no more,"i'll stop really.."because with that we get no where! all that does is help for like a sec-short term results because all you end up doing is going back to "it". this isnt some part-time job! full time commiment yes i know you're only human but it seems to me that you let that control you more than you actually try to fight it! sure you feel guilty afterwards but all you do is go back to it..PRAYING helps! just spending time with the LORD everyday..even if its for like 10 mins! may not seem like a lot but seriously you'll begin to see a difference after awhile. Start with a devotion book...it'll help! definetly have someone help keep you accountable. have a couple if it'll help more-but i mean the more help ya can get the easier it'll be to get thru this. no offense or anything but ya cant do it on ur own! god loves you so much and he'll bless you with ppl in ur life that can help you and he'll help you too! he's god he can do anything and everything! <> [Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<philippians [...] me<>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.] blah-sorry-i havent written in such a long long time....but this is a long one so if ya read it...it'll keep ya busy! ARE YOU FOR REAL..... well are you? I wanna know and SORRY im not going to leave ya alone til' ya tell me...anything and everything! Afraid to say something? are you scared of the consequences? too *flippin' burger bad!* sorry to be mean but "tough" love is needed of coarse not by you but me to get you to spill your guts! no more beating around the bush! no more,"i'll stop really.."because with that we get no where! all that does is help for like a sec-short term results because all you end up doing is going back to "it". this isnt some part-time job! full time commiment yes i know you're only human but it seems to me that you let that control you more than you actually try to fight it! sure you feel guilty afterwards but all you do is go back to it..PRAYING helps! just spending time with the LORD everyday..even if its for like 10 mins! may not seem like a lot but seriously you'll begin to see a difference after awhile. Start with a devotion book...it'll help! definetly have someone help keep you accountable. have a couple if it'll help more-but i mean the more help ya can get the easier it'll be to get thru this. no offense or anything but ya cant do it on ur own! god loves you so much and he'll bless you with ppl in ur life that can help you and he'll help you too! he's god he can do anything and everything! <><philippians 3:14-i can do all things thru jesus christ who strengthens me<>< ~my thoughts on temptation~ its really hard to deal with tempation i know i face it everyday...i mean being a teenager is hard the world just seems to attack you with things,such as,you should care on how you look, clothes,makeup?,junk that in the end doesnt matter. girls and boys both face problems with purity because it seems like the world is saying being not pure is ok and its kewl! well according to gods word it isnt. i mean the bible says that ur body is like gods temple to treat it right. and pardon me but how is being not pure, having tatoos and what not treating it like a temple? so many ppl in todays world dont know the meaning of abstitence and for those of us that do it makes it really hard but ya know we can deal with it but still its hard. but ya know what you dont have to face it alone b/c gods there for you to help you thru w/e ur going thru and he'll give you ppl who will help too! jesus knows how you feel i mean the dude was in the desert for 40 days being tempted by the devil (king of all lies)himself, but he made it thru by using gods word! bam! the second he'd mention the truth satan would leave. and when u get into it satan will attack you too but ya know you can beat him you can get thru it! just believe in the power of prayer, the power of GOD b/c reading his word and obeying it will get you thru anything and everything! believe me there's hope for you! god loves you he wouldnt have sent his only son for just anyone..i mean he sent it for us b/c he loves us all so much! and he doesnt love anyone more or less than the next he loves us all equally! and he's thee coolest person in the world because he's always there for you no matter what! hope you would actually take the time to read this...b/c i think its awesome and really has something to say and i hope if you read this you can get something out of it too! 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Thursday, October 14th, 2004
7:02 am	whao-step away from that donut! So i was @ the gas station the other day...looking @ the oh so yummy donuts and this person just walks up and starts "eyeing" the same donut! they start to walk closer and then step back but yet they're closer than i am..so im just thinking.."oofta-step away from that donut before i tackle you to the ground!" honestly i started to get a lil' sweaty. then im just like i cant take any chances...so i politely say "excuse me please" but they they're like "just one second" and open the door to grap for one im just like AHHHH! inside of coarse and as they reach in...all of a sudden bam! this robber comes in and says everyone on the floor! bam! we all drop to the floor! sweaty even more now --its like im raining lol ok not that dramatic but you get the picture right? hopefully! anyways...As their getting the money and we're all freaking out his accomplist comes in and might i say oofta! i mean whats a good looking guy doing crime like that! but they make a mad dash off and the cops are called..we're all questioned yatta yatta yatta..but as a token of sympothy they give us a free donut..i made a mad dash for them and grabbed the donut i was loving the moment i laid my eyes on it! and that other person grabbed the donut that was next to the one i wanted..oofta! guess i over reacted oh well..and that really did happen i dont think i'd care that much about a donut but who knows..dun dun dun..you've exited the twilight zone..please stay inside until the vehicle has came to a complete stop! thank you for traveling with weirdo-420 please come again! (Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 12th, 2004
6:50 am	you talkin to me... Picture it a little person with short hair (hair color-doesnt matter!)and they're wearing a shirt that says "woot!". Anyways..they see you walking towards them and they start up a nice or what you think would be a nice convo with you! "Hey you! you rock-totally and i so love tator don! woot! wait one rock-pickin' minute! why am i teling you my deepest thoughts? i dont even know you! but jesus loves you and if does then so do i! he did say "love your neighbor as you love urself" oofta! wait...i know i just met you and we dont really know each other but do you think i talk to much? i want an honest answer---wait! wait! why are you running away screaming in a panic from me? I was just trying to show you some love! is that so wrong! *blah* ok...so we'll do lunch sometime? ok--you can get back to me when you can!" --->inside their mind they're thinking---oofta glad i got that off my..3 legged turtle named 'don juan da marco-the worldest fastest turtle in the world! twisted! totally! knarly!...but i mean im so happy to get that off of him because it was really starting to squish him i mean why do you think he only has 3 legs? huh? lol ok i'm j/k j/k in a twisted only i get it kinda way muhahahaha! but seriously i really had ya going didn't i? dont lie! #9-thou shall not testify falsely againist thy neighbor!..dun dun dun..and i know where you live! and when your mother sees what i've done to you...she'll --she'll...fall on the floor hysterically laughing on the virg of wetting herself because it'll be so flipping burger funny! lame-o! blah j/k..but you have a super duper and if you read this and are having a bad day..hope it was able to make a small dent of happiness into ur day! love- big beff woot! (Comment on this)
Thursday, October 7th, 2004
7:10 am	woot-amen-praise the lord So this last weekend i happen to go on the annual fall retreat with my youth group. it was super duper fun. i really got closer to some people and had some good bonding time. woot. yet i learned a lot about god too ! but when we left and i got home i was like whoa where's my retainers! but i called my youth pastor the next day and now like 3 days later i finally found out that the place we went found them so anytime now im going to get them back. woot!sorry to make this so short but i got class but i'll write later lol..who knows when but yah.. love bigbeff (Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 5th, 2004
8:56 am	breakaway from this world.. Right now im listening to the song "breakaway" by kelly clarkson..good song i say ol'chap! but it puts me in like my activist mood lol. Break away from this world be your own person do not let the world corrupt your mind because all the world will do is bring you down! Ruin ur self esteem make you think you have to be a certain way or act a certain way to be excepted by others. I say "NO!" no more lil' white gloves! lol if you're a girl dont be sucked into the whole be prissy missy blah blah blah. Do not be afraid to do not so lady things for example me...im comfy bleching! im proud because one) not a lot of girls can actually belch! 2) most guys i meet are impressed lol or at least think its funny in a kinda of gross way i know lol..but hey its a weird special talent that i've been blessed with! Plus its fun to participate in burping contests! lol....Do not be another model of the world be YOURSELF DO NOT BE AFRAID TO EXPRESS THE THINGS YOU BELIEVE IN. LET NO ONE OR ANYTHING BRING YOU DOWN. AND ALWAYS REMEMBER NO MATTER WHERE YOU END UP REMEMBER WHERE YOU CAME FROM. YOU MAY NOT BE ABLE TO CHANGE THE WHOLE WORLD BUT YOU CAN MAKE A DENT IN IT AND PEOPLE ALWAYS NOTICE A DENT! i should know i have one on my car lol..neways AS JAMES DEAN SAYS "DREAM AS IF YOU'LL LIVE FOREVER, LIVE AS YOU'LL DIE TODAY" just dont enjoy the wrong things such as drinking and smoking but they're apart of this world and like i said dont be blinded by that crapt be urself seperate urself from the world DARE TO BE DIFFERENT! THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARENT THINGS..hence religion..hence God because he can give you happiness that NOTHING on this EARTH can even come close ! nothing on this earth can even compare to the happiness and joy and blah that God can give you! trust me on this one! when you get this overwhelming feeling and just start crying with joy you know that's an awesome God moment and when you experience something like that..there's no turning back! dont let the "one" blind you with his evil thoughts and let you think evils of the world are fun b/c they'll get you no where...jesus is the only way to pure happiness!<>< fishy lol <>< woot woot! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, October 1st, 2004
9:10 am	ben-jammin lately... hey my fellow amigos! and how are we today? hopefully super duper terrific! yah! totally..like super right?but yah im just sitting here jammin out to relient k . Yet there's thee two "lovers" practically "macking out" infront of everyone ok not so infront more like they're trying to hide in this somewhat lil' section thingy by the bathrooms but yah.. Anyways..watching them makes me wanna scream out "NO FREAKIN' PDA ALLOWED IN SCHOOL " OR " GO GET A FREAKIN' ROOM BEFORE MY BREAKFAST COMES UP AGAIN!" i mean seriously but w/e floats their boat but i g2g i'll ttyl bubye love- bigbeff (Comment on this)
Thursday, September 30th, 2004
1:41 pm	vroom vroom baby! so im sitting in the concoarse and this machine in the arena is like ''vroom vroom!" -->and i just felt like sharing this special moment with y'all! because in a special way i love y'all! lol..but yah...today im wearing my pink flip-flop/high heel shoes today..they not to bad but yet they hurt my feet! but idk im quite bored because all im doing is watching a friend eat but class is going to start soon or at least the bell will ring soon but yah! i'll talk to y'all later (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, September 28th, 2004
8:58 am	wow im retarded so last night when i wrote the first thumb buddy entry i didnt think it worked just because it said i had to validate my email and junk whatever floats their boat! anyways...so this morning i wrote another entry about my thumb buddy and me and what happens in the end...i find out that the other one that worked! but yah im sitting here on the floor while my butt goes numb! oofta! why my fellow classmate from orchestra bribes my other classmate to write his poems for english class..$5 per poem.! heck i'd do it lol. So this morning i was like "hmm..i wonder if i can find a parking spot?" and i do and when i walk towards the school what do i see with my little eyes! two parking spots-FRONT ROW PARKING SPOTS! i mean i tell ya! but i was to lazy and in the end didnt care to much about getting one of those parking spots! but w/e i'll ttyl bubye for now (Comment on this)